SPAIN 6: Just Dance

'Dance as though no one is watching, love as though you have never been hurt before, sing as though no one can hear you, live as though heaven is on earth.' ~ Souza

Jorge and I burst through the door, and began our morning race to the top of the hill.  My lungs burned and threatened to burst, but I kept on running.  The sun was hidden behind a valley of fog; I could have sworn our tiny village had lifted straight off the ground, and turned into a castle in the sky.  We raced on with our eyes focused toward the top.  This is the first morning that I was able to run all the way without stopping to catch my breath.  I couldn't help but think of Rocky, so I threw up my hands, and danced around pumping my arms up and down.  Jorge seemed impressed that I had made it, but unamused by my victory dance.  I continued on alone down the other side of the hill, as Jorge always seems to disappear around this time.  There wasn't a single soul in sight.  The streets were empty, and the fog threated to take over the city.  I guess I'm the only one who feels like running around the city, threw a cloud, early on a Sunday morning.  It was nice to explore the city without the eyes of strangers following my every movement. I walked on enjoying the silence and the solitude.

The sun seems to enjoy dissolving the clouds each day, and I don't complain when it does.  Day by day it gets a little warmer, and the wind has ceased for now.  Jorge is a demanding little bugger, and I happily volunteer to take him wherever he wants to go.  For the afternoon walk I decided to grab my ipod, why I hadn't thought of that before I'll never know, and out the door I went with Jorge at my heels.  Michael Bubble's song 'Feeling Good' started to play. 'Birds flying high - You know how I feel. Sun in the sky - You know how I feel. . . .It's a new dawn! It's a new day! It's a new life! For me . . .And I'm feeling good!' http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yYe6tmrFxbw It's one of my favorites, and I couldn't help but dance! I am not noted for my dancing skills, and there is a reason that no one asks me to sing, but today I put all inhibitions aside. If you want to see what some of my dance moves were - check out the video above.  I don't think Michael is noted for being an amazing dancer either, and I couldn't help but bust up laughing knowing that I looked even more ridiculous than him while dancing through the streets of Alcala.  I sang and danced my way to the top of the town.  Here are some more of my moves: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CLqsdPUfnno. Throwing in some shoulder, because as a very flamboyant man once told me in a club while we were dancing to 80's music, "It's all in the shoulders, Baby! The shoulders!"  Talk about staring! The few people that had crept from there homes this Sunday afternoon, were amused to find a loco gringo for their entertainment.  I didn't care for the first time in my life that other people were watching me dance, or listening to me screech - I mean sing.  It was liberating, and it caused me to laugh at myself.  I danced all the way back home, and straight through the door into the plaza where Rike was setting up for dinner.  There my host, as well as his guests, were enjoying the warmth of the sun, and they couldn't help but laugh when they saw my moves.  I was more than happy that I could add some enjoyment to their day.  Laughter, after all, is the best medicine!  Why not have it be an ingredient in food too? A little parsley, a dash of love, tomatoes, a shimmy here and a shimmy there, garlic, and laughter! Luckily for me, bad dancing still produces really tasty food! I mean how many times at home did I dance around the kitchen while cooking and thinking to myself, 'I love my life!!!'?

I have learned to enjoy taking on the challenge of changing the mind's of those around me.  Today I received the best compliment since I've been here, "You are the best thing to come out of America." one of guys from the EU said with agreeable nods from the others.  Finally! It only took over two weeks to convince them that I'm not all that bad, but I did it.  Mission accomplished!

I get asked a lot if I have a boyfriend waiting for me back home.  One of our guests, after only being here for two days, asked me today as we walked the town.  I shook my head as I replied, "No. We broke up a few weeks before I left." "Why on earth someone would let a beautiful creature such as yourself go, is beyond me!" she said in amazement.  I could only laugh as I have never been called a creature before.  Perhaps it is a British term, but it caused me to think about what it is like to be a creature.  It doesn't usually have a positive connotation attached to it, but given the tone and sentence structure I'm assuming it was a good thing.  One of the dictionary definitions of a creature is 'anything created'.  Which got me to start thinking about the reason I was created.  I could give a philosophical or religious answer, but basically I came up with one very basic conclusion. Enjoyment.  Whether or not you believe you were God inspired, in the process of reincarnation, or simply here.  Whatever your belief system is, I think that we are placed on earth to enjoy the life we were given, as long as that enjoyment is not at the detriment of others.  In the process, my enjoyment consists of experiencing as much of this world as there is to discover, helping people along the way, and evolving as a more complete person at the end of my life because of the people I've met and the experiences I've had.  Constant growth, whether through pain and suffering, laughter and love, or simply consciously breathing.  I believe that God gets great pleasure out of  watching us truly enjoying the life that He gave us, the earth He has provided us, and the growth that we experience.  My name means 'helper of mankind', and I thoroughly enjoy helping people.  That is partly why I am working my way through the world rather than just saving up money to go on holiday.  But what does true enjoyment entail? Where is the balance? That seems to be a question that I ask myself a lot.

The other day Rikke took me into a pastry shop.  Little did I know that it was to teach me a lesson.  We have had an ongoing and constant debate about our differing beliefs.  Mostly about why anyone in their right mind would abstain from having sex outside of marriage.  It is beyond her capability of understanding to grasp why I would even want to hold back.  Her argument is that waiting until marriage is an ancient tradition created to protect women long ago when they couldn't take care of themselves if they were to get pregnant.  "You enjoy eating, breathing, and long, hot showers.  Why wouldn't you enjoy sex too? It is healthy for you."  I appreciate when people challenge my beliefs.  I like to ponder their origin and why I still have them.  It causes them to either become more ingrained as my own, rather than my parent's and my guilt ridden upbringing from the church; or weed out the ones that don't really belong.  What am I suppose to tell her? Because I was told not to by God?  I'll get in trouble from my mommy and daddy? Because my future marriage won't be blessed or I'll go to Hell? Why is it that I believe the way I do? Any answer that gave seemed to fall short of logic, and I have learned to simply listen and ponder; rather than argue.  Back to the pastry shop.  Rikke and I have gotten into quite the habit of eating a pastry from every shop that we pass, so when we went into this one I was already salivating and ready to choose! "Mmmmmm.  Look at all of them! So many to choose from! Don't they look delicious?" her voice had an undertone of malice, and I was starting to think that we hadn't just walked into this shop simply for a pastry.  "We aren't buying one today though." she said with a sideways glance.  I whined, "Why in the world wouldn't we?" "It isn't any fun to walk into a pastry shop just to torture yourself.  Is it?" she inquired.  I got the point as we walked out and I continued my fit.

I'm not going to pretend that I am perfect, or have been.  I'm not. Period.  One of the reasons that I want to travel is to 'find all the pieces of me around the world', and challenging my foundation is a good place to start. It has opened my mind to new ideas, extraordinary possibilities, and left me to examine myself in the mirror.  Do I like what I see? Now, please don't worry or get any crazy ideas! I'm not going to become 'the village bicycle' or any such nonsense, nor am I going to abandon my beliefs because I don't have all of the answers.  I am just happy that my world is being shaken up, and my ways are being challenged.  At home, you rarely have the opportunity to be stirred up with a difference of opinion, because we don't want to offend each other.  I don't have all the answers just yet, but then again, I hope I never do . . . I want to keep exploring, discovering, and being awakened on a daily basis!

For now, I have learned to dance like no one is watching, sing like no one is listening, and live as though heaven was on earth.  Daily I am working on loving like I have never been hurt.  I don't find it difficult to love the strangers I see, or the people around me in my circle of life,  but loving those that have hurt you . . . I'm still working through the pains on that one.  But the great thing is, I believe I'm on the right path, and I'll be where I want to be someday.  I'm not worried about how long it will take me to get there, just that I enjoy the journey - wherever it may take me.